Wow. There is so much to say and I don't even know where to begin. I know I should blog more often, it just takes time for me to take the time to sit down and just start typing. Well, first things first, I'm doing great! It's drawing closer to my first anniversary and it just seems like I married that boy last week! I can't believe in just 16 short days it will be one year. How time just flies when you're having fun or as my grandmother used to always say "in misery either one."(Hehe) Now, of course, you 'seasoned' folk can remember back to your first year of marriage and humor yourselves to decide how you think I could describe mine. I think I could write a book with the title "What They Don't Tell You in Marriage Counseling" and sell a million copies. Lord, the stories I could tell! Adam and I were just discussing today what we thought were our funniest times over the past year. Hardest times. Saddest times. Breaking times. Craziest times. My first day living in Greensboro was the worst, I locked myself out of my car, laundry room and apartment all in one day. (Huge laugh now but huge tears that day.) First fight? We couldn't remember. Craziest thing we've done? Got a dog. (Real adventurist!) Hardest time? Trying to decide what we wanted out of our marriage that we hadn't seen in our own parents'/role models' marriages. That last sentence was a lot easier to type then that decision was to make let me tell you. But most of all, I pray for many years of pure splendid happiness to come. They always say the first year is the hardest and if it is we've got this.
A lot has changed since my last blog, such as I have a new salon, Adam has been around the world and back, we've gotten our first baby girl "Lucy"(yes, Lucy and the Sky with Diamonds was the inspiration) just to name a few. Small things first, Lucy is a 'Boxador' meaning she is a Labrador/Boxer mix. She will be a year old March 14 and is the biggest cuddlier of an animal you will ever meet. Oh so precious!
Next, Adam has been all over the globe. Many of you who aren't aware, he travels with a gospel group called "The Hoppers" out of Madison, NC as their sound engineer and product manager. He travels everywhere, included in his latest travels are, Europe, Canada and all across the beautiful USA. I do get the privilege of traveling some when my salon schedule permits. Which brings me to my next update, my new salon. I moved to CK Hair Designs on Lawndale on January 15 and made one of the greatest and hardest decisions of my career when I did. Without going into any unnecessary detail, I will say I didn't realize how stressed and burned out I had become until I removed myself from the misery I put myself through every day and decided to make a change for the greater good of my business and clients. It's so funny to me how some will not tell you what's wrong or something that personally happened until you're gone. My biggest fear when I moved was that none of my clients would follow. Most told me they were thrilled to hear I had moved. I've even gained new clients since I've been there. God always gives you exactly what you need when you need it and not a minute to soon or to late.
On a more serious note, I feel like the last year has been a whirl wind to say the least. From having my fears come true, loosing friends, gaining new friends, finding a job, moving into a new job, finding a church, maintaining a home, learning to pay bills(on time). That's just a hand full of things that have occurred. Crazy. So many life lessons have been taught and learned in the last 12 months that I don't even think I could write them all down or even know if they were for anyone else but me to learn. This road has been nothing less than challenging to put it lightly. But as I sit here and type I smile just seeing how far I've come and how different I am from a year ago. Number One marital advice? Think before you speak, not while you're hearing yourself say it. Practicing that will help you in all aspects of life. I'm becoming more of a watcher instead of a talker. I could never understand as a child why my great grandmother would always look at me and say "God gave you two ears and one mouth for a reason young lady. Now don't get 'em confused." I do now. Truth hurts but it always comes out in the end. No matter what you do to stop it. My granddaddy told me one time, "Some life experiences are like getting a stain out of your clothes. In the end, it'll all come out in the wash." Sometimes you think you have to be the first one to tell it or you have to be the first to admit. Truth is truth and lying is lying. It'll only be a certain amount of time before "it'll all come out in the wash." I know I'm not perfect but I'm so thankful that I serve a God who washes me white as snow when I mess up and don't know how to fix things. I don't believe I ever remember being as uncertain as I am at this point in my life. You can't trust anyone. I grew up as a naive little girl and when real life hit I was lost. I don't say that to sound sissy, like a baby or to even sound like I'm having a pity party for myself. It was a rude awakening to find out your childhood heroes were nothing more than just average people who did nothing but make themselves out to be liars and bitter heartless cowards. It was hard to face the fact that not everyone is who they say they are or they believe in what they say they stand for. Affairs are real. Just because they say it doesn't make them right, nor does it mean it's true. It's hard to face the hard facts that some people are so heartless they will go as far as to try and break up families with lies that are only hearsay to try and make their own-righteous-self look better. How those so called "friends" were no where to be found when you needed a shoulder to cry on but the first one to give ear to the gossip. And those same "friends" ditch you because they're to embarrassed to be associated with such 'shameful sin'? I think those are called hypocrites. For those of you who aren't aware of what/who that might be, just visit your local church on a Sunday morning and you will be attending their usual weekly meeting. It's funny, is it not, how people can talk? But one word about their life or their issues and it's all hush hush. Don't get me wrong, I'm not proposing all churches or people who attend church are hypocrites. This is just where a lot of them go to feel better about their wrong-doings by putting someone else down. Life Lesson? No one is perfect. I know now why old people have all the advice. They've been there, done that. I don't have to try to be anybody else, heck! everyone I've always wanted to be like has turned out to be either a liar, a whore, gossiper, two-faced, backstabber, coward or all the above. Why would I wanna be like that? Everyone makes mistakes and when I realized it was easier to accept the faults, forgive, and move on, life became so much fun. Every saint has a past and every sinner has a future. John 14:27 has been the biggest help to me recently and I encourage you, whoever is still interested in reading this far, to dig into the Word of God and search for His word for you specifically. To me, it meant so much to have a verse that I can cling to when I feel defeated or depressed. I'm content with who God made me, it's peaceful to know it's ok to be just me. No one else may ever want to be me but that's ok because God made me for me. I don't fret quiet as much about what people think about me, it doesn't matter what they think or say. I don't answer to them. And always know when you are coming out of a situation, understand that you didn't go through that experience to become a bitter person but to become a better person. If more people would stop trying to be everyone else and have what everyone else has to just being themselves, there might not be as much jealousy, bitterness, or hatred in the world.
There is so much more I could chat about but for now it's time to close. Thank you for reading and until next time...enjoy the "sweet life"...
Carmen
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